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This is the lmao webpage. It is dedicated to all you funny people out there who make me laugh. Thanks
guys.
Monty Python's Revenge
You don't frighten us, English pig-dogs! Go and boil your bottom, sons of a silly person.
I blow my nose at you, so-called Arthur King, you and all your silly English k-nnnnniggets.
I don't wanna talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough wiper! I fart in your
general direction! You mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!
Oh, I am afraid our life must seem very dull and quiet compared to yours. We are but eight
score young blondes and brunettes, all between sixteen and nineteen-and-a-half, cut off in this castle with no one to protect
us. Oooh. It is a lonely life: bathing, dressing, undressing, making exciting underwear. We are just not used to handsome
knights.
Oh, what sad times are these when passing ruffians can 'ni' at will to old ladies. There is
a pestilence upon this land. Nothing is sacred. Even those who arrange and design shrubberies are under considerable economic
stress at this period in history.
Follow. But! Follow only if ye be men of valor, for the entrance to this cave is guarded by
a creature so foul, so cruel that no man yet has fought with it and lived! Bones of full fifty men lie strewn about its lair.
So, brave knights, if you do doubt your courage or your strength, come no further, for death awaits you all with nasty, big,
pointy teeth.
And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying,'O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade
that with it thou mayest blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.' And the Lord did grin, and the people did feast upon
the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals and fruit bats and large chu--
And the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count
to three, no more, no less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four
shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number
three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being
naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.
How you English say, 'I one more time, mac, unclog my nose in your direction', sons of a window-dresser!
So, you think you could out-clever us French folk with your silly knees-bent running about advancing behavior?! I wave my
private parts at your aunties, you cheesy lot of second hand electric donkey-bottom biters. No chance, English bed-wetting types. I burst my pimples at you and call your door-opening request a silly thing,
you tiny-brained wipers of other people's bottoms!
Everytime your family talks, it sounds like owls having sex.
I'm gonna kick your ass! But first I'm gonna squeeze it.
You look so brown and bloated, its like Tes' mammogram.
Tes has to put on white gloves when she eats tootsie rolls so that she doesn't eat her fingers.
Thanks Last Comic Standing
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